Attitude of Gratitude: lounger moms. I'm not a helicopter mom. I've officially not gotten off the ground. I'm a slacker mom, or more specifically, a lounger mom. I'm trying to invent a remote control for kids, but I haven't got all the kinks out of it yet.
Let me give you an illustration. Hank is really a mathmatical whiz at finding the shortest distance between two points. In laymen's terms that means while getting dressed, it is faster to forgo the underpants, belt, or socks, than take the time to enter the world fully clothed and in his right mind. One time I took him into his pediactric cardiologist for a test. There he was with pants sagging, no belt, no whitie-tidies to cover his crack as he held his jeans up with one hand and running on the treadmill holding on for dear life with the other. A laughing nurse put her finger in his belt loop to hold his britches up so he could continue his jog. As a slacker mom, I refuse to do underwear checks every morning. I wish I could say that such embarassment has changed his behavior, but I fear not. Nevertheless, I still rely on natural consequences to reap their due, clearly understood consequences. If we are no longer unaware of his lack of underwear, he can't leave the house that day.
My husband agrees but sometimes lets them work out the consequences by themselves. When I was gone awhile back, my husband was tired of the boys tattling and fighting so he sent them out to the backyard arena to bop it out. The winner sat on the other for the countdown. They came in much more subdued, and with no serious injuries, I might add.
The other day an unnamed child lost his temper and screamed at me. It was so bad the dogs were barking at him, both dogs. I almost joined in the barking, but decided to rely on the way we parents have of controlling the reigns by making his account due and payable for his charged up card manner: it cost him. He was on restriction for the rule, if you can't get along at home, you don't get to leave the house, clearly understood consequences for behavior. The mantra, "You don't understand," is responded to by, "I have heard you and understand what you are saying, but I don't agree with you. Since someone has to make the decision, and since we are your parents, this is the decision your father and I are making. I'm sorry if you don't like it."
Dr. Dobson used to say that a policeman shaking his fist at speeding motorists blowing his whistle does little to nothing to curb behavior no matter how red in the face he becomes. It's his ability to pull us over and to write the ticket that makes us face the consequences.
Here are some examples...
"I'm older and should be able to stay up later." "Okay, we'll give you an extra half hour as long as you are able to get up by...If not, the bedtime will return to what it was before."
"Pick up your socks, or the dog will choke to death on them, or if they pass on through, you will clean it up."
"Brush your teeth or your friends will know that you forgot."
"Put your clothes in the dirty clothes or they will not be washed."
"Be home for dinner or there might not be anything left for you and you will be grounded from...a week."
"If you don't put in your school lunch order, you will be making your own lunch for the week."
What kind of parent is God? When we are but little lambkins, he tenderly carries us and tells His disciple to "Tend my lambs" (John 21:15). "Yet it is I who taught Ephraim to walk, I took them in My arms...I led them...with bonds of love...and I bent down and fed them" (Hosea 11:3-4). But He lets us suffer the natural consequences of our decisions. He warns us, but He lets us choose to obey or disobey. He forgives us, throws our sin in the deepest sea, but doesn't spare us the consequences of our sin even after repentance. We still get the stomache ache after eating too much forbidden fruit.

"Today if you hear His voice, do not harden your hearts as when they provoked Me in the wilderness where your fathers tried Me by testing Me, and saw my works for forty years. Therefore I was angry with this generation, and said, 'They always go astray in their heart; and they did not know My ways; and I swore in My wrath 'They shall not enter My rest.' Take care, brethren, lest there should be in any one of you an evil, unbelieving heart, in falling away from the living God. But encourage one another day after day, as long as it is still called 'Today,' lest any one of you be hardened by the deceitfulness of sin...." Hebrews 3:7-13
"I will put My laws into their minds, and I will write them upon their hearts. And I will be their God, and they shall be My people...for I will be merciful to their iniquities, and I will remember their sins no more" (Hebrews 8:10-12).
"So my people are bent on turning from Me...How can I give you up, O Ephraim? How can I surrender you, O Israel?...My heart is turned within Me, all My compassions are kindled" Hosea 11:7-8. That's the kind of parent God is.
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